Problematic Butterfly
I was sitting on the train this morning thinking. We’re over. It can’t work. He doesn’t know what he wants, and I don’t think he will know for a long time. It seems so sad to know that it's all over. That something that had that much potential just sort've fizzled and died. And it's not even because of me. It's because of him, so I have no control over it whatsoever. yes things often come at a risk sometimes, but still, I never thought/realised that in us going so fast then, that things couldn't be salvageable now.There's no way that I can change his mind. I can't make him love me. It takes too much effort. And like my best friend pointed out - why stick to something that's going to be so hard to make work? He's not interested anyway. So what's the point?
Yes we could start becoming friends again, but what's in it for me? There are no guarantees. If I go back into this with the thought that we may still have potential I’m just setting myself up for the fall.
What am I doing to do? What do I do when all I want to do is run into his arms and wish that we could start over again. I just want to hug him and tell him that everything's ok, and that we will work out.
But the sad reality is, he doesn't know what he wants. He doesn't know what he wants from a relationship and he's so sure that our outlooks on relationships are so different that there is no way that it would work out.
I don't want to beg anymore.
...what am I going to do?
I was listening to Dashboard on the train this morning, and the song 'As Lovers Go' popped up. If only realities followed the same trajectory as certain sets of song lyrics. If only life echoed scenarios played out in songs.
She said, "I've got to be honest,
You're wasting your time if you're fishin' around here."
And I said, "You must be mistaken,
I'm not foolin', this feelin' is real."
She said, "You've gotta be crazy!
What do you take me for? Some kinda of easy mark?"
"No, you've got wits,
You've got looks,
You've got passion,
But i swear that you've got me all wrong."
All wrong
All wrong
But you've got me
I'll be true, I'll be useful, I'll be cavalier,
I'll be yours my dear
I'll belong to you
If you just let me through
This is easy as lovers go.
So dont complicate it by hesitating.
This is wonderful as loving goes.
This is tailor-made,
What's the sense in waiting?
I said, "I've got to be honest,
I've been waiting for you all of my life."
For so long I thought I was asylum bound,
But just seeing you makes me think twice.
And being with you here makes me sane.
I fear I'll go crazy if you leave my side.
"You've got wits,
You've got looks,
You've got passion,
But are you brave enough to leave with me tonight?"
Tonight
Tonight
You've got me
I'll be true, I'll be useful, I'll be cavalier,
I'll be yours my dear
I'll belong to you
If you just let me through
This is easy as lovers go. So dont complicate it by hesitating.
This is wonderful as loving goes.
This is tailor-made, what's the sense in waiting?
This is easy as lovers go. So dont complicate it by hesitating.
This is wonderful as loving goes.
This is tailor-made, what's the sense in waiting?
This is easy as lovers go. So dont complicate it by hesitating.
This is wonderful as loving goes.
This is tailor-made, what's the sense in waiting?
Dashboard Confessional - As Lovers Go
posted by Enigmatic Butterfly @ 9:18 am
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